TEBOW, JETS, REX, FEET, SANCHIZE….

Tim Tebow’s trade to the Jets, Sexy Rexy Ryan’s locker room rounded shit show, has created too much.  It is almost a gift from the comedy gods.  Or a curse.  It literally makes no football sense.  It makes only media circus sense.  Everyone hates him.  Everyone loves him.  We could not figure out how to cover this… so here’s our attempt:

REX RYAN NAMES EVERY WILDCAT PLAY AFTER PORN STARS

TEBOW BEGS REX RYAN TO STOP LICKING HIM

JETS HOPE TEBOW CAN MOTIVATE SANCHEZ TO COMPLETE 40% OF HIS PASSES

SANCHEZ RELIEVED TO KNOW BACKUP QB IS “DEFINITELY WORSE THAN ME”

JETS CUT EVERY RECEIVER

NEW YORK MEDIA GIVES UP ON SOURCES, WILL WRITE WHATEVER THE FUCK THEY WANT

JETS EXPECT PUNTING, LOTS OF PUNTING

UUUUUUGGHHHHHHHHHHHH

TEBOW MEETS JETS FANS, GIVES UP ON RELIGION

REX RYAN FORCES TEBOW TO WATCH GAME OF THRONES

NEW YORK MEDIA FIRST TO EVER HAVE SEX WITH TEBOW

TEBOW KEEPS WINKING AND SMILING, REPULSING JETS FANS

REX RYAN GOES TO TEBOW’S CHARITY EVENT “TO GET PUSSY”

TEBOW REPLACES SANCHEZ AS NEW YORK’S WORST PASSER AND ELI AS DUMBEST GUY WHO ALWAYS SMILES

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