The Stanley Cup is over but the war between the coasts has just begun. Greasy Jersey trash rioted late last night, furious their Devils lost to such “gross, bleached blonde whores.”
Countering, LA Kings faithful, who until very, very recently were unaware of the hockey franchise, rioted following their victory. Kings’s fans added they hope “those greasy, fake titted Jersey bitches go back to their beach!”
Jersey bitches was having none of that shit. “Okay, okay, okay, every LA girl, is trash. Done. That’s a fact. That’s a fucking fact. They’re gross and fake and all on diet pills and have to give a blow job to get work!” screamed Angie Anatolli, a local masseuse at Boardwalk Rubdowns.
Traci Lamps, an actress, claims she has followed the Kings all year and the Devils fans are the fairweather “hobags who are all gross with their fake tans and nails! Uh… get a reality show already biiiitch!” Traci was unavailable for further comment since she received a call from boyfriend / manager.
It is good to see so much passion between hockey fans. Congratulations to the big breasted, fake blondes of the Kings and our condolences to the big breasted, bronzed fans of the Devils.