Hall of famer and basketball icon Larry Bird admitted that he would rather spend recess with Lakers guard Kobe Bryant than the Miami Heat’s LeBron James.  Bird answered rather candidly saying “if I was an infant regularly spitting up vomit on myself and rolling in my feces, I’d rather it be with Kobe.”

He continued: “Kobe provides the best chance to win and win and win in Lego wars.  Can LeBron promise that?  Can he guarantee he won’t start eating pieces in the fourth quarter of recess?  Can he smash a space ship toy against the ground without another star to help him?”

LeBron responded: “it’s easy to make me a target.  Anytime a bead goes up someone’s nose it is

Miss Teacher there's icky on my face!

LeBron’s fault.  Anytime someone falls off the castle it is LeBron’s fault.  Anytime someone rolls off the mat during nap time it is LeBron’s fault.  I.  Don’t.  Wike. It!”

Bird is known for aggressive taunts and spitting during play times.  Many called this “dirty playing” while others attributed it to the former Celtic’s competitiveness.

LeBron, Kobe and Bird all sought each other out after finger painting and got into a heated screaming match before passing out from all that exertion.  Yes they did, yes they did those cute widdle guys!

How this man was ever accepted in Boston I will never know