Miami Heat superstar LeBron James brilliantly saved a baby today before losing it in the 4th. The Heat star just cannot finish the game.
On a routine Friday morning jog, King James noticed a burning building. Proving he is not that different than you or I, King James approached the fire because “it’s cool.” However, firefighters and emergency response were unable to retrieve a baby caught on the 8th floor. James sprung into action.
Adjusting his $4,000 sneakers and $6,000 shorts, James threw powder into the air and stormed the blaze. Traditionally, LeBron takes his time in the opening minutes to learn his opponent, no exception here: LeBron played conservatively through the first floor opting for the stairs over the hotshot-elevator route.
In the next few floors / minutes James was in rare form: jumping over burning blocks, staying low on defense and avoiding smoke, he moved toward the child with the freakish athleticism he is known for. The superstar then went to the roof and climbed down the fire ladder to safety.
Just before handing the baby off to its mother, James dropped the child. Classic LeBron.
James handed off the child one handed, in some late game showmanship, only it backfired. The child was especially wiggly and rolled out of his palm, face planting onto the concrete. LeBron, stunned, posed for a few seconds with his hands at his sides before walking off the court disgusted with himself. Most of the onlookers agreed, if he’d passed to Dwyane Wade, James wouldn’t have had to take the final shot.
Chris Bosh watched the event and laughed before onlookers asked who he was. Despite assertions that he is an NBA superstar, no one confirmed it.
Wait... we're up by 50? Why did I still lose? THIS DOESN'T MAKE SENSE!!!!